Bruno and I go for walks and jogging almost every morning. We mark our territory, check out any new smells, and enjoy being outside among the birds, squirrels and other animals. There is no better way for us to begin our day than to have the wind in our faces stretching our legs. As of late it is not the motivation to go for that outing that I search for each morning, it is gathering the resolve to return. As soon as we cross the bridge at the park to return to the house, we step back into the world of Man and the smell, no, STENCH of pollution from cars and the ever crushing noise of people going everywhere and nowhere at the same time. At the park, the morning joggers/walkers greet each other with "Good mornings" and "Hellos". Outside of the park, it is all about the self and rushing to do those all important task that requires people to be rude and nasty to each other. Is there a manner barrier that surrounds the park and ends the moment one leaves it's borders? I actually look forward to greeting those regulars out to torture themselves for health and those I have yet to get to know at the park. Why does my attitude towards people change when I leave? Yes, I too am guilty of using the manners barrier of the parks confines. What changes for me? I still say hello and good morning, but it feels different. Forced, almost, and uncomfortable. I am not sure what changes in them or me, but I will search for the answers to this mystery.
As for the return to the house and the world of Man, I turn around and slog ever onward, but to what?
so did you do this when you lived here?
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I think that I have always felt this way. I never felt as if I 'belonged' anywhere, around other people and the places I have been. Iv'e only felt "at home" once and it was short-lived. Not due to others' attitudes, I've just always felt as if I were intruding everywhere and into eveyone's lives. In the wilds, I feel at ease, ALIVE, free, and at peace. Like I finally belong .
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